A Pebble story

Many years ago in a small Indian village, a
farmer had the misfortune of owing a large sum of money to a village moneylender.

The moneylender, who was old and ugly, fancied
the farmer's beautiful daughter.

So he proposed a bargain.

He said he would forgo the farmer's debt if he could marry his daughter.

Both the farmer and his daughter were horrified by the proposal.

So the cunning money-lender suggested that they let providence decide the matter.

He told them that he would put a black pebble
and a white pebble into an empty money bag.

Then the girl would have to pick one pebble from
the bag.

-If she picked the black pebble, she would become his wife and her father's debt would be forgiven.

-If she picked the white pebble she need not marry him and her father's debt would still be forgiven.

-But if she refused to pick a pebble, her father would be thrown into jail.

They were standing on a pebble strewn path in the farmer's field.
As they talked, the moneylender bent over to
pick up two pebbles. As he picked them up, the sharp-eyed girl noticed that he had picked up
two black pebbles and put them into the bag.

He then asked the girl to pick a pebble
from the bag.

Now, imagine you were standing in the field.

What would you have done if you were the girl?

If you had to advise her, what would you have told her?

Careful analysis would produce three possibilities:

1. The girl should refuse to take a pebble.

2. The girl should show that there were two black pebbles in the bag and expose the money-lender as a cheat.

3. The girl should pick a black pebble and sacrifice herself in order to save her father from his debt and imprisonment.

Take a moment to ponder over the story.

The above story is used with the hope that it will make us appreciate the difference between lateral and logical thinking.

The girl's dilemma cannot be solved with traditional logical thinking.

Think of the consequences if she chooses
the above logical answers.

What would you recommend to the Girl to do?
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The girl put her hand into the moneybag and drew out a pebble.
Without looking at it, she fumbled and let it fall onto the pebble-strewn path where it immediately became lost among all the other pebbles.

"Oh, how clumsy of me," she said. "But never mind,
if you look into the bag for the one that is left, you will be able to tell which pebble I picked."

Since the remaining pebble is black, it must
be assumed that she had picked the white one.

And since the money-lender dared not admit his dishonesty, the girl changed what seemed an
impossible situation into an extremely advantageous one.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Most complex problems do
have a solution.

It is only that we don't attempt to think.

It's all about Attitude

Michael is a kind of guy you would love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say.

When someone would ask him how he was doing, would reply, “If I were any better, I would be twins!”

He was a natural motivator.

If any employee was having a bad day, Michael would be there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.

Seeing this style made me really curious, so one day I went up to Michael and asked him, “I don’t get it! You can’t be a positive person all off the time. How do you do it?”

Michael replied, “Each morning I wake up and say to my self, you have two choices today.

You can choose to be in a good mood or….you can choose to be in a bad mood. I choose to be in a good mood.

Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or…. I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it.

Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaint or….I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life.

“Yeah, right, it’s not that easy,” I protested.

“Yes, it is,” Michael, said. “Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice.

You choose how you react to situations.

You choose how people affect your mood.

You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood.

The bottom line: it’s your choice how you live your life.”

I reflected on what Michael had said. Soon thereafter, I left the Tower industry to start my own business. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.

Several years later, I heard that Michael was involved in a serious accident, falling some 60 feet from a communication tower.

After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Michael was released from the hospital with rods placed in his back.

I saw Michael six months after his accident. When I asked him how he was, he replied. “If I were any better, I‘d be twins. Wanna see my scars?”

I declined to see his wounds, but I did ask him what had gone through his mind as the accident took place?

“The first thing that went through my mind was the well being of my soon to be born daughter,” Michael replied. “Then, as I lay on the ground, I remember that I had two choices: I could choose to live….or I could choose to die. I chose to live.”

“Weren’t you scared? Did you lose consciousness?” I asked.

Michael continued, “…..the paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared.

In their eyes, I read, “He is a dead man. I knew I needed to take action.”

“What did you do?” I asked.

“Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me,” said Michael.

“She asked if was allergic to anything.”

“Yes, I replied.” The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply.

I took a deep breath and yelled, “Gravity.”

Over their laughter, I told them, “I am choosing to live. Operate me as if I am alive, not dead.”

Michael lived, thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude.

I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully.

Attitude, after all, is everything.

“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”

“After all today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.”

Enjoy each day, each breath and mostly-----each and every friend.

The First Date

This is a real story. A story of the funniest first 'date' of two strangers!

It was midwinter...Snowing and quite cold...when the man took her first 'date' out for skiing at Gulmarg, in Kashmir valley.!!

It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and truly had never met before.

The outing was fun and relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon. They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra coffee that she had before leaving. They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of nowhere!

Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her go beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car. They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself!

Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation. Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation!!!!

As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender.(!!)
She attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme cold.

Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she answered her date's concerns about "what is taking so long" with a reply that indeed, she was "freezing her butt off" and in need of some assistance!

He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing.
She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma.
Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem... Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal!

Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free.
So, as she looked the other way, her "first-time date" proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender.

Oh and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband two months later!

******************************************************************************************************************************

The Guy's Rules

These are our rules!
Please note… these are all numbered "1"
ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.
See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria’s Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted in two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really!!!

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about--unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as cricket, the football season, or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

Thank you for reading this.

Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
-But did you know, men really don't mind that? It's like camping…

The Ten mistakes MEN make

The Ten Most Dangerous
Mistakes YOU Probably
Make With Women.
And What To Do About It....

Here Are The Top Ten Reasons Why Men Fail With Women.And How To Make Sure YOU Avoid Every One Of These Deadly Common Mistakes...

MISTAKE #1: Being
Too Much Of A .Nice Guy.

Have you ever noticed that the really attractive women never seem to be attracted "nice" guys?

Of course you have.

Just like me, I'm sure you've had attractive female friends that always seemed to date "jerks"... but for some reason they were never romantically interested in YOU.

What's going on here?

It's actually very simple...

Women don't base their choices of men on how "nice" a guy is. They choose the men they do because they feel a powerful GUT LEVEL ATTRACTION for them.

And guess what?

Being nice doesn't make a woman FEEL that powerful ATTRACTION.

And being NICE doesn't make a woman CHOOSE you.

I realize that this doesn't make a lot of logical sense, and it's hard to ACCEPT... but GET OVER IT.

Until you accept this FACT and begin to act on it, you'll NEVER have the success with women that you want.

MISTAKE #2: Trying To
.Convince Her To Like You.

What do most guys do when they meet a woman that they REALLY like... but she's just notinterested?

Right! They try to "convince" the woman to feel differently.

Well, I have news for you... YOU WILL NEVER CHANGE HOW A WOMAN "FEELS" WHEN IT COMES TO ATTRACTION!

Never, ever, EVER.

You cannot CONVINCE a woman to feel differently about you with "logic and reasoning".

Think about it.

If a woman doesn't "feel it" for you, how in the world do you expect to change that FEELING by being "reasonable" with her?

But we all do it.

When a woman just isn't interested, we beg, plead, chase, and do our best to change her mind.

Bad idea. One that will never work.

MISTAKE #3: Looking To Her
For Approval Or Permission

In our desire to please women (which we mistakenly think will make them like us), us guys are always doing things to get a woman's "approval" or "permission".

Another HORRIBLE idea.

Women are NEVER attracted to the types of men who kiss up to them... EVER.

Don't get me wrong here.

You don't have to treat women BADLY for them to like you.

But if you think that treating a woman well means "always getting her approval and permission for things", think again.

You will never succeed by looking for approval. Women actually get ANNOYED at men who seek their approval.

Doubt me? Just ask any attractive woman if Wussy guys who chase her around and want her approval annoy her...

MISTAKE #4: Trying To .Buy. Her Affection With Food And Gifts

How many times have you taken a woman out to a nice dinner, bought her gifts and flowers, and had her REJECT you for someone who didn't treat her even HALF as well as you did?

If you're like me, then you've had it happen a LOT.

Well guess what?

It's only NATURAL when this happens...

That's right, I said NATURAL.

When you do these things, you send a clear message:

"I don't think you'll like me for who I am, so I'm going to try to buy your attention and affection".

Your good intentions usually come across to women as over-compensation for insecurity, and weak attempts at manipulation. That's right, I said that women see this as MANIPULATION.

MISTAKE #5: Sharing
.How You Feel. Too Early In
The Relationship With Her

Another huge and unfortunate mistake that most men make with women is sharing how they "feel" too early on.

Attractive women are rare.

And they get a LOT of attention from men.

Most men don't realize this, but attractive women are being approached in one way or another ALL THE TIME.

An attractive woman is often approached several times a DAY by men who are interested. This translate into dozens of times per week, and often HUNDREDS of times per month.

And guess what?

Attractive women have usually dated a LOT of men.

That's right. They have EXPERIENCE.

They know what to expect.

And one thing that turns an attractive women off and sends her running away faster than just about anything is a guy who starts saying "You know, I really, REALLY like you" after one or two dates.

This signals to the woman that you're just like all the other guys who fall for her too fast... and can't control themselves.

Don't do it. Lean back. Relax.

There's a much better way...

MISTAKE #6: Not .Getting. How Attraction Works For Women

Women are VERY different from men when it comes to ATTRACTION.

You need to accept this fact, and deal with it.

When a man sees a beautiful, young, sexy woman, he INSTANTLY feels a sexual attraction.

But does the same apply for women?

Do women feel sexual attraction to men based mostly on looks? Or is something else going on?

Well, after studying this topic for over five full years now, I can tell you that women usually have their "attraction mechanisms" triggered by things OTHER than looks.

Have you ever noticed that you see a lot more average and unattractive men with beautiful women than the other way around?

Think about it.

Women are more attracted to certain qualities in men... and they're attracted to the way a man makes them FEEL than they are to looks alone.

If you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that YOU feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman.

But it's not an accident. You have to LEARN how to do this.

And ANY guy can learn how...

MISTAKE #7: Thinking That It
Takes Money And Looks

One of the most common mistakes that guys make is giving up before they've even gotten started... because they think that attractive women are only interested in men who have looks and money... or guys who are a certain height... or guys who are a certain age.

And sure, there are some women who are only interested in these things.

But MOST women are far more interested in a man's personality than his wallet or his looks.

There are personality traits that attract women like a magnet...

And if you learn what they are and how to use them, YOU can be one of these guys.

YOU DO NOT have to "settle" for a woman just because you aren't rich, tall, or handsome.

Let me say this again: If you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that YOU feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman.

MISTAKE #8: Giving Away
All Of Your Power To Women

Earlier I mentioned that it's a mistake to look to a woman for approval or permission.

Well, another similar tactic that a lot of guys use is GIVING AWAY THEIR POWER to women.

Said differently, guys try to get women to like them by doing whatever the woman wants.

Another bad idea...

Women are NEVER attracted to men that they can walk all over... Women aren't attracted to Wussies!

MISTAKE #9: Not Knowing
EXACTLY What To Do In Each
Type Of Situation With Women

Now I'm going to blow your mind...

A woman ALWAYS knows what you're thinking.

Women are approximately TEN TIMES better than men at reading body language. That's ten TIMES.

I know, it might be hard to believe. But for example, if you're out on a date with a woman, and you want to kiss her, she knows it.

And if you don't know exactly what to do and exactly HOW to kiss her, and you just sit there looking at her and getting nervous, she won't help!

And this goes for ALL aspects of women and dating...

Approaching a woman, getting her number, asking her out, kissing her, getting physical... everything.

If you don't know what to do in each situation, you will probably screw it up... and LOSE EVERYTHING.

And you KNOW it.

It is VITALLY important that you know EXACTLY how to go from one step to the next with a woman... from the first meeting, all the way to the bedroom.

MISTAKE #10: Not Getting HELP

This is the biggest mistake of all.

This is the mistake that keeps most men from EVER having the kind of success with women that they truly want.

I know, guys don't like to make themselves look weak or helpless. We don't like to ask for help.

Hey, I've been there myself.

Let me tell you a little about me and how I figured out how to be successful with women...

About five years ago I became fed up with the fact that I didn't know how to approach, meet, and get dates with women that I was attracted to.

It frustrated the hell out of me.

One night I was out with a friend, and I saw a woman I wanted to ask out, but I just couldn't get up the nerve to do it. I can still remember that night... right on the spot I made the decision to do whatever it took to learn how to be successful with women and dating.

Well, after a lot of hard work and trying all kinds of crazy things, I finally figured it all out.

I can now approach just about any woman and get her number almost instantly. I've dated models, I've dated actresses, and I've dated nice, normal, regular girls as well.

It has been a very rewarding experience. I no longer feel that sick, insecure feeling... like I don't know how to meet women... and I might wind up alone.

I know that anytime, anywhere, I can go out and meet attractive women.

I've written a book on the topic, and I've done seminars on both coasts of the United States... and taught tens of thousands of men all around the world.

The Hot Water Bottle

This is just too beautiful not to share...

This story was written by a doctor who worked in South Africa...

One night I had worked hard to help a mother in the labour ward; but in spite of all we could do, she died leaving us with a tiny premature baby and a crying two-year-old daughter. We would have difficulty keeping the baby alive; as we had no incubator (we had no electricity to run an incubator).

We also had no special feeding facilities. Although we lived on the equator, nights were often chilly with treacherous drafts. One student midwife went for the box we had for such babies and the cotton wool that the baby would be wrapped in.
Another went to stoke up the fire and fill a hot water bottle. She came back shortly in distress to tell me that in filling the bottle, it had burst (rubber perishes easily in tropical climates). "And it is our last hot water bottle!" she exclaimed. As in the West, it is no good crying over spilled milk so in Central Africa it might be considered no good crying over burst water bottles. They do not grow on trees, and there are no drugstores down forest pathways.

"All right," said, "put the baby as near the fire as you safely can, and sleep between the baby and the door to keep it free from drafts. Your job is to keep the baby warm."
The following noon, as did most days, I went to have prayers with many of the orphanage children who chose to gather with me. I gave the youngsters various suggestions of things to pray about and told them about the tiny baby. I explained our problem about keeping the baby warm enough, mentioning the hot water bottle, and that the baby could so easily die if it got chills. I also told them of the two-year-old sister, crying because her mother had died.
During prayer time, one ten-year old girl, Ruth, prayed with the usual blunt conciseness of our African children. "Please, God" she prayed, "Send us a water bottle. It'll be no good tomorrow, God, as the baby will be dead, so please send it this afternoon."

While I gasped inwardly at the audacity of the prayer, she added, "And while you are about it, would you please send a dolly for the little girl so she'll know you really love her?"

As often with children's prayers, I was put on the spot. Could I honestly say, "Amen". I just did not believe that God could do this. Oh, yes, I know that He can do everything, the Bible says so. But there are limits, aren't there? The only way God could answer this particular prayer would be by sending me a parcel from homeland. I had been in Africa for almost four years at that time, and I had never, ever received a parcel from home. Anyway, if anyone did send me a parcel, who would put in a hot water bottle? I lived on the equator! Halfway through the afternoon, while I was teaching in the nurses' training school, a message was sent that there was a car at my front door!

By the time I reached home, the car had gone, but there, on the veranda, was a large twenty-two pound parcel. I felt tears pricking my eyes. I could not open the parcel alone, so I sent for the orphanage children.
Together we pulled off the string, carefully undoing each knot. We folded the paper, taking care not to tear it unduly. Excitement was mounting.

Some thirty or forty pairs of eyes were focused on the large cardboard box. From the top, I lifted out brightly coloured, knitted jerseys. Eyes sparkled as I gave them out. Then there were the knitted bandages for the leprosy patients, and the children looked a little bored. Then came a box of mixed raisins and sultanas - that would make a batch of buns for the weekend. Then, as I put my hand in again, I felt the.....could it really be? I grasped it and pulled it out - yes, a brand-new, rubber hot water bottle. I cried. I had not asked God to send it; I had not truly believed that He could. Ruth was in the front row of the children. She rushed forward, crying out, "If God has sent the bottle, he must have sent the dolly too!"

Rummaging down to the bottom of the box, she pulled out the small, beautifully dressed dolly. Her eyes shone! She had never doubted!

Looking up at me, she asked: "Can I go over with you and give this dolly to that little girl, so she'll know that Jesus really loves her?"

That parcel had been on the way for five whole months. Packed up by my former Sunday school class, whose leader had heard and obeyed God's prompting to send a hot water bottle, even to the equator. And one of the girls had put in a dolly for an African child - five months before, in answer to the believing prayer of a ten-year-old to bring it "that afternoon."

"Before they call, I will answer" (Isaiah 65:24) this awesome prayer takes less than a minute. When you receive this, say the prayer, that's all you have to do. No strings attached! Just send it on to whomever you want - but do send it on. Prayer is one of the best free gifts we receive. There is no cost but a lot of rewards. Let's continue praying for one another.

Father, I ask you to bless my friends reading this right now. I am asking YOU to minister to their spirit at this very moment. Where there is pain, give them YOUR peace and mercy. Where there is self doubting, release a renewed confidence to work through them. Where there is tiredness or exhaustion, I ask YOU to give them understanding, guidance, and strength as they learn submission to YOUR leading. Where there is spiritual stagnation, I ask YOU to renew them by revealing YOUR nearness, and by drawing them into greater intimacy with YOU. Where there is fear, reveal YOUR love, and release to them YOUR courage. Where there is a sin blocking them, reveal it, and break its hold over my friend's life.

Bless their finances, give them greater vision, and raise up leaders and friends to support and encourage them. Give each of them discernment to recognize the evil forces around them, and reveal to them the power they have in YOU to defeat it. I ask you to do these things in Jesus' name.
Amen.

P. S. passing this on to anyone you consider a friend will bless you both.

Passing this on to one not considered a friend is something Christ would do.

"Do not ask the Lord to guide your footsteps if you're not willing to move your feet”

The Mayonnaise Jar and 2 Cups of Coffee...

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough; remember the mayonnaise jar...and the 2 cups of coffee...

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else! He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous “yes”.

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, “I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things-your God, family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favourite passions -- things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car.

The sand is everything else -- the small stuff. If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal." Take care of the golf balls first -- the things that real matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."

To succeed in your work and in your life: You have to trust in something - your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever.

This approach will never let you down. It makes all the difference in your life.

Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don't lose faith. You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don't settle.