Wednesday, January 13, 2016

Osho - Being Friends

If you know the art of being friendly, you can share with as many people as possible, with as many animals as possible, with as many trees as possible, says Osho.

Gautama Buddha emphasises friendship very much. To translate his word for friendship — Maitri — is a little difficult because it has the quality of friendliness more than friendship. Friendship becomes a relationship, fixed; friendliness is more flowing, more fluid. Friendship is a relationship; friendliness is a state of your being. You are simply friendly; to whom, that is not the point. If you are standing by the side of a tree you are friendly to the tree, or if you are sitting on the rock, you are friendly to the rock. To human beings, to animals, to birds, you are simply friendly. It is not something static; it is a flow, changing moment to moment.

The Buddha says: To have friends in need is sweet.

Friendliness is one of the most significant qualities for the seeker to develop; In the Buddha’s vision, it is higher than so-called love. Your so-called love is tethered to your biology; friendliness is freedom from biology. The ordinary so-called love is the same in human beings as it is in animals, as it is in the trees.

Friendship is a higher phenomenon. It is pure love; it has nothing to do with your biology. Ordinary love — can be explained through biology, but friendship cannot be explained. It is a mystery. Friendship is like fragrance; it helps you to transcend your animality.

The Buddha praises friendship, friendliness, very highly. He has even chosen that when he comes back again, his name will be Maitreya — the friend. He must have loved the word very much. I don’t think he will come again or anybody ever comes again. God never makes the same mistake again, remember! Once is more than enough, twice will be too much. But he must have loved the word so much that he says, “Next time, if I am at all going to come, my name is going to be Maitreya, the friend.” The word contains his whole philosophy.

He says: ‘To have friends... is sweet.’ Why is it sweet? Because with friends, your relationship is not physiological, it is not even psychological; it is a spiritual communion. With friends you can sit in silence. When you are with your lover, you can’t sit in silence; silence looks awkward. The woman will think, ‘Why are you silent? Are you angry or something?’ And if she is silent, you will think something is wrong — she is sulking. Silence becomes heavy, a burden; it has to be removed. So people go on talking, whether it is needed or not.

You can share your happiness only with friends. Sharing is possible only when two hearts are open to each other; only in deep trust can you be open to the other. In fear you are closed, in doubt you are closed. You are on guard. You are afraid the other may be some danger to you, the other may do some harm. You are not vulnerable when you are in fear. Only with friends you can be vulnerable, open, available. Then sharing is possible. And sharing is one of the greatest spiritual qualities.

The miracle is that the more you share your bliss, the more you have it. The more you share, the more it comes to you. The more you share, the more you become aware of an inexhaustible source within yourself.

Happiness is great in itself, but to share it makes it immensely rich. If you are miserly about your happiness, you will kill it. To hoard your happiness is to destroy it; to spread it far and wide is to help it grow. If you know the art of being friendly, you can share with as many people as possible, with as many animals as possible, with as many trees as possible. You can go on sharing every moment of your life because you are always with someone. You can share it with the sun, with the moon, with the stars.

Distances don’t matter. You can share your bliss with a friend who is far away. In that moment of sharing, space disappears, time disappears. There is no time gap, no space gap. You are suddenly together. You can even share with friends who are no longer alive. In deep communion, they become available to you, nonphysically.

Excerpted from Dhammapada: The Way of the Buddha, Courtesy Osho International Foundation, www.osho.com

No comments:

Post a Comment